Week Eleven: The Brewmaster and The Sands End

Week Eleven

  Another week completed in what has been an eventful start to 2014.  This week saw only the two new places which is good news for the readers out there who get bored easily at the longer editions.  Shout out to Hattie Hamilton who hosted a cracking birthday party at Foundation Bar in Covent Garden on Friday night.  I didn't realise until arrival that I had been here before otherwise it would be getting a favourable review this week.  Warning to people with sensitive ears, the place is very loud!

  Despite my mid mid life crisis (I'm turning 25 in the next few weeks) I still visited two new places which were both pubs and both of very different standards.  

Special guests include: Will Matthews, Josh Lee, Gabriel Langford and the return of Luke Chopper Harris.

 

Summary of The Brewmaster

Name: The Brewmaster

Type:  Pub

Location: 37 Cranbourn Street, Leicester Square, London, WC2H 7AD

Website: http://www.traditionalpubslondon.co.uk/brewmaster/

Date Visited: 21/03/14

Price: Normal price

Rating: 1.7/5

Review

  Will and I fancied going for a quick drink before heading off to the Foundation Bar in Covent Garden for Hattie Hamilton's birthday (Shout out).  'Where will do a good beer?' I thought.  Surely this place which arrogantly calls themselves The Brewmaster. Wrong!  This pub is grim.  It smelt like feet inside the building, there was an extremely weird vibe inside and the clientele were very suspect to say the least.  It was an uncomfortable drink 

  Pricing wasn't too bad but there wasn't a great range of lagers in all honesty.  The outside seating/smoking area was ok but nothing special.  I would say it was one of the worst pubs I have been to in a considerable amount of time.  This is despite us managing to get a table at the busiest trading time on a Friday night.   The reason for this was probably because the table was very very sticky, peeling off a good layer of my jumper away, as it felt like it hadn't been cleaned by the staff all night, neh ever.  Avoid this place like the plague. I vow to never go back.

Never has a name been so misleading

  

Summary of The Sands End 

Name: The Sands End

Type:  Pub

Location: 135-137 Stephendale Road, London, SW6 2PR

Website: http://www.thesandsend.co.uk/

Date Visited: 22/03/14

Price: Well priced

Rating: 4.1/5

Review

  What a cracking pub this is.  The reason for the visit was that Josh Lee chap (See Madrid addition) was visiting from Leeds so I went to join him, Gabes and Chopper for a well earned drink after work. (Working on Saturday and still visit new places, how do you do it?)  The guys were fairly chirpy on arrival as they had been at the joint early doors and unsuprisingly had highly recommended this place on the phone.  To be fair to them it didn't disappoint. 

  If you go on the website they say 'they are trying to bring a slice of the countryside to London'.  I actually think they achieve this pretty damn well as it really does feel like a proper traditional countryside pub you expect to find in a village in the middle of nowhere.  Well done chaps.

  Other things this place boasts about is having cracking old rustic wooden tables which are a joy to sit around, a well arranged/placed bar and a even better addition is the fascinating literature in the toilets.  Here they have amusing recent articles to read (for the guys out there) while relieving.  What more can this place have? Becks Vier of course, the drink of choice for The Partyman.  The price for this was £4.10 which is fairly decent for London but the only thing is £4.10 is a slightly frustrating amount  It's so close to the round number of £4 but yet so far.  You give them a £5 note and you get back a ton of silvers instead of the popular £1 coin which we all love.  Fairly innocuous complaint to be fair. 

 Oh and this place had an IPhone 4 charger which always goes down well with me as you all know by now (see Bodeans week for reference).  Shame I couldn't of stayed here longer or sampled the food but I've been told only good things.  If you live just north of the river in South West London and you haven't been here....come.  I'm guess I am a bit behind on this place to be fair and you are all probably fully aware of this pub.

No photo of the place but heres my #nomakeupselfie.  Donated of course. 

God I'm so topical and generous. Good look eh?

Poem Advice

Feeling a little touristy
wanting a drink in Leicester Square
Don't go to the Brewmaster
This place is having a mare

Wanting a countryside feel
In London's South West
Then head over to Sands End Pub
I swear I do not jest.

 Timeout London seem to have gone a bit cold on the column offer but they could be playing it cool (no pun intended). 

  Anyways a big event this week with both Warwick School's Under 15's and Under 18's playing in the NatWest Rugby final this Saturday at Twickenham.  Come on the boys!  Big day.

See you next week fans

X

Follow me on Twitter @jackgravestock

Week Ten: Will Matthews' Birthday

Week Ten

  Another eventful week and a whole host of new places.  I found myself in central, south west and north London all in a week.  Wow, what a man I am.  On Saturday it was my housemate's 25th birthday so a long day of drinking was in store (such lads) with many new places to see.  Solid week.

Special guests include:  Will Matthews (birthday boy), Collo, Lefty, Katrina Lennon, my biggest fan (Chris Hazell), Kroegs, Dico, Hayts, Newbs, Grubs, Treesy, Pyatt, the Pearce twins, Nix and Nix's friend Jos.


Summary of Crazy Bear

Name: Crazy Bear
Type:  Bar and Restaurant.
Location: 26-28 Whitfield Street, Fitzrovia, London, W1T 2RG
Website: http://www.crazybeargroup.co.uk/fitzrovia/
Date Visited: 11/03/14
Price: Wallet burning expensive
Rating: 3/5

Review

  This bar is situated near Goodge Street and if you are not at your eagle eyed best you could easily miss it, as its tucked away quite nicely.  This place is pretty uber cool with an Asian restaurant at the top with a bar with dark mood (minimal) lighting downstairs.  Suits me to a tee...love a bit of favourable lighting.  This bar in all fairness has lovely décor and the waiters were pretty on it when serving us our drinks.  Get the strawberry and basil cocktail when you come here, went down a storm. 

  The weird thing about this place is that the bar is 6 foot below from where you are sitting.  It's a little bit strange as the bar staff are literally 1 metre below you when you give your order.  Fairly odd and unless you've been there you won't know what I mean.  Also the toilets have no signs with no door handles.   You have to continuously push against variant parts of the wall until you find the door.  The Ladies and Gents toilets are side by side which was dangerous to say the least.  The Ladies toilet is on the left hand side if you ever come here to avoid the embarrassment I suffered.
 
3 cocktails came to £47.00.  That's why I try to steer away from Central London because my wallet whimpers after. 



Summary of Chipotle

Name: Chipotle
Type:  Mexican
Location: 147 Leadenhall Street, London, EC3V 4QT
Website: http://www.chipotle.com
Date Visited: 11/03/14
Price: Like Nandos....overpriced for what it is
Rating: 2.25/5

Review

  If you haven't been to this place before you're not missing much.  It's basically the Mexican version of Nandos.  Now this is going to cause some outrage I'm sure but I am not a big fan of Nandos.  Maybe it's down to me finding the lemon and herb flavour spicy (can't handle spicy food) but I find the place overpriced and a fast food joint disguising itself as a restaurant of high class. 

  Chipotle is much of the same.  I don't like spicy food so I had to go for a very boring mild option with limited filling. Yes the burrito was tasty and quite nice but was that and beer worth £15. No it god damn wasn't.   Do I get plate? No you can have a paper bowl with a plastic fork. Bon appetite 

Summary of Catcher in the Rye

Name: Catcher in the Rye
Type:  Gastro Pub
Location: 317-319 Regents Park Road, Finchley Park, London, N3 1DP
Website: http://www.faucetinn.com/catcher-in-the-rye/
Date Visited: 15/03/14
Price: Standard.
Rating: 2.75 / 5

Review

  Saturday had arrived which meant it was Will Matthews birthday.  This also meant on the beers from 11am (Oh you didn't!)  First stop of the day was Finchley Park at their finest pub called The Catcher in the Rye.  Here we watched the England V Italy rugby game and others used it to line their stomachs with a burger. 

  This is a very standard pub so I can't fault it in any way.  The beer was priced competitively, they provided a very high standard quality of nuts it must be said and they showed the rugby.  One criticism of the place and why it falls short of 3 is that they only had one small screen in the corner and there was a lack of atmosphere in the establishment.  Again it was midday and only England V Italy so I'll let them off.

Clapham North at 11am...nutters!

 
Summary of Allianz Park

Name: Allianz Park
Type:  Stadium
Location: Allianz Park, Greenlands Lane, Hendon, London, NW4 1RL
Website: http://www.allianzpark.com/
Date Visited: 15/03/14
Price: Questionable
Rating: 2.5 / 5

Review

  After the England V Italy game it was time to get in the taxis and head to the middle of nowhere to watch our old school (Warwick) play in the Under 15 Rugby Semi Final of The NatWest Cup.  Allianz Park was the stadium and unlike the previous pub the atmosphere was electric.  To give you a quick review of the game: Warwick won 12-8.

  This stadium was impressive and the sun was shining so all was well in our group of 9 thirsty lads.  The crowd were chanting to add to the occasion and the beers were priced ok to be fair. 

  What let this place down was that they decided to only open one bar, which I am sure they wouldn't do on a game day, and the Guinness (back on the Guinness again are you Jack??) was flat.  Now the barmaid bloody well told me it was flat as she passed me the 4 pints saying she was going to have to change the keg.  Did she give me new beers? No! Did she charge me full price? Yes!

  For that and the fact it’s in the middle of nowhere and fairly tricky to get back to civilisation I have to mark it down 0.5.  Lovely stadium though.

What a fantastic photo

Summary of The Garden Gate

Name: The Garden Gate
Type:  Pub
Location: 14 South End Road, Hampstead, London, NW3 2QE
Website: http://www.thegardengatehampstead.co.uk/
Date Visited: 15/03/14
Price: Variant
Rating: 4.25 / 5

Review
 

  Well hello there.  This is a superb pub! By this point our group of 9 lads had been joined by 2 girls and the drinks were really flowing.  This place boasts to having the best pub garden in London.  It's not far off it in all fairness and we sat there for a good few hours happy as Larry.  During this point drinking rules were in full flow and bets on how quick we could all down pints between each other were constant.  Very normal behaviour for 25 year old males.

 Yes Ireland beat France so England didn't win the Six nations but that didn't dampen our spirits.  This place is well worth a visit and if you are on an all dayer in North London then come here for a good session.  Best pub I've been too for a while.

 Can you spot the golf ball in the pint?



Summary of Sugar Cane

Name: Sugar Cane
Type:  Hawaiian themed bar 
Location: 247 Lavender Hill, Clapham Junction, London, SW11 1JW
Website: http://www.thesugarcane.co.uk/
Date Visited: 15/03/14
Price: Ok.
Rating: 3 / 5

Review

  After venturing into the unfamiliar territory of North London for the day it was time to go back to where we felt comfortable and safe. Clapham Junction.  Will's long birthday day had turned to the evening event where the Sugar Cane bar was to be our final destination.  Now I like this place but there will be those amongst you who will not like it I can tell you.

  It is very cramped, especially downstairs, and has a very sweaty vibe to it.  In addition to that, it’s not the biggest place but it is good fun.  The wait at the bar isn't particularly long which is handy and the music policy downstairs is nothing short of outstanding. They play all the classics so be prepared for standing around in a circle throwing questionable shapes and singing along...all night long.  One criticism is that it is cramped on the dancefloor which means you can get quite heated.  I'm talking Artesian Well on Saturday night if you know what I mean.

  This place is a good laugh for a night out effectively, it doesn’t try to be anything (apart from Hawaiian) original or spectacular, it just has a couple of palm trees at the front, nice décor (second time I have said that) inside, well priced drinks and good music. 

Birthday boy Will Matthews on the left and my biggest fan (Chris Hazell) on the right

God we are such party animals

Poem Advice


If you have a tinder date,
then Crazy Bear will impress
With the cocktails that expensive
You'd hope they'd undress

Catcher in the Rye,
Standard pub which shows sport
But the poor screen in the corner,
Means the place falls short

Rugby, beers and scorching sun?
Then go to Allianz Park
After the game order a taxi
When it arrives it'll be dark

The best pub garden in London,
It's certainly at the garden gate
I can't tell you how good it is,
One of the highest I do rate

Sugar Cane in Clapham,
Hawaiian theme I'm told
Cramped and very sweaty,
You certainly won't be cold



  I have to say I am running out of creative poetry but not places you'd be pleased to hear, so tune in next week for Week 11.


  Of course I am open to recommendations so if you do have any places you highly recommend do let me know.  The Partyman is always open to suggestions.

See you next week fans
x
Follow me on Twitter @jackgravestock

Week Nine: The Florence, The Craft Beer Co and Richmond Cafe

Week Nine

 
  Well this week doesn't quite have the culture as last week and to be honest it won't be as interesting (just).  Once again I would like to congratulate all of you who made it all the way through last week. 4000+ words...good effort chaps.  This week includes two pubs and a Thai restaurant with all them being ok but nothing to write home about.  We also see the return of the financier (Dad) who was responsible for us getting tickets to Twickenham and taking us for a memorable Thai after.
 
  Special guests this week include the work colleagues: Alex Auger, Eloise, Lucy T, Will Porritt, Nick (The Boss), Liv, Simon, Javed, Craig, Jonny and Lisa. 
Other special guests include: Lefty, my biggest fan (Ging), Joe (the brother), the financier (Dad) and his work colleagues/friends.

 

Summary of The Florence

 

Name: The Florence

Type:  Pub

Location: 131-133, Dulwich Road, Herne Hill, London, SE24 0NG

Website: http://www.florencehernehill.com/

Date Visited: 06/03/14

Price: Quite expensive for a packet of crisps

Rating: 2.75/5

Review

    The occasion was leaving drinks for Alex before she goes off travelling and unfortunately I can't really give too much of a detailed review as I was only here for one drink because I had to drive home (responsible).   However the pub is really cool inside and one of the most popular places to go for a beer in Herne Hill and I think it would be a great boozer for 4-5 jars if you are ever in the area.
 
  One criticism of this place is that it was one of those places where you had to spend £5 minimum on card.  The beer came to £4.10.  'How much are a packet of crisps Sir?' I asked.  '£1.10', he replied.  That'll do the trick.  Is it me or is £1.10 an extortionate amount for a packet of crisps?  To be fair they were chorizo flavour....premium price for premium goods and they did get me over that £5 threshold.
 
  In conclusion, would suggest going here if you are in Herne Hill and find yourselves in Brockwell Park.  Come with cash but if not get the chorizo flavoured crisps.  Even better don't be stingy and get a round in...that'll take you over £5.

Don't you just love those people who post photos of what they eat. 

 

Summary of Craft Beer Co

 

Name: Craft Beer Co

Type: Pub

Location: 128 Clapham Manor Street, Clapham, London, SW4 6ED

Website: http://thecraftbeerco.com/pub/clapham/

Date Visited: 08/03/14

Price: Standard

Rating: 3/5

Review
 
  Right controversy alert.  I have actually been inside this building before but when it was under different ownership and called the Manor Inn.  However this place is called the Craft Beer Co so in effect it is a new place.  They have put Astro turf outside the front where the smoking area is so that's sort of new. 
 
  Again I am afraid to say I wasn't in this place long as Lefty, my biggest fan (Ging) and I were on a pub crawl around Clapham.  Decently priced beer from memory (stop it) and when I asked one of the locals to take a photo of the three of us for the blog we got this photo of the photographer instead:

Cheers mate

 
  Recommend this place for a beer if you stumble across it.  Astro turf for a smoking area...genius or bizarre? 
 

Summary of Richmond Café

 

Name: Richmond Cafe

Type:  Thai Restaurant

Location: 58 Hill Rise, Richmond Hill, Richmond Upon Thames,   TW10 6UB

Website: http://www.zomato.com/london/richmond-cafe-richmond/menu

Date Visited: 09/03/14

Price: Ask Dad

Rating: 3?

Review

  To keep up the theme with this week’s blog, I am unable to give this a very fair and accurate review.  Anyhow it was good to see the return of the financier which always means the brother and I are in for a cheap afternoon, he would say free.

  This just wasn't any day though, this was England V Wales at Twickenham....what a game.  Unfortunately I have been to Twickers before so I can't count it as new.  What I can tell you is that we had Guinness’s in our hand from midday (You didn't...not back on it again...relentless you are!) and the sun was beaming for the first time in 2014.
 
 Well after the rugby game, where England were victorious  if you missed it, we had a few more beers back at the west car park (cheeky).  After this it was into Richmond to get some food but I banned the usual curry house so Dad booked us in for a Thai restaurant called Richmond café...sounded like it had a lot of Thai history.
 
  In general this place did noodles and served red wine but apart from that my culinary review stops there.  My father, my brother and I unfortunately cannot shed any further light on the meals as it had been a long day, a very long day.  In effect it filled us up so I won't hear a bad word said about this place and I will go back here so I can sample it properly.  Apologies for the vagueness.

  No photo from the restaurant but to keep in line with the photo theme this week, here is a photo of the financier taking an accidental selfie

The Financier

Poem Advice

Walking around Brockwell Park,
Or find yourself in Herne Hill,
Then pop into the Florence,
Over £5 the minimum bill

If Astro turf at an entrance,
Is what you crave and desire
Craft Beer Co's for you then
But no areas to hire?

Been at Twickers for some rugby
and fancy eating Thai
Don't know if Richmond cafe's good
but why not go and try


  Thanks once again to all of you guys for reading again and I can only apologise for quite a stale week due to the lack of new places and the unfortunate case of memory loss.  
 
  Next week should be good as a trip to Goodge Street has already occurred and we have Will Matthew's Birthday Day on Saturday.  Should be a whole host of new places.  By the way that's a link to my twitter at the bottom.  Thought I'd point it out as don't seem to be getting any new followers....
 
See you next week fans

X

Follow me on Twitter @jackgravestock

Week Eight: Madrid

Week Eight

 

  Is this my most eagerly anticipated blog of the year so far? I think it probably is due to the fact I was abroad in Madrid from Thursday to Sunday.  Right so I will split this into three days and take you through the trip as if you were there with me (god knows you wish you were).  Effectively myself and 12 other lads (13 in total) headed out to Madrid for a bit of culture and a bit of alcohol.  In a stroke of good fortune (some would say because I am the Partyman) I knew a good friend of mine out there called Emma Horner who showed our group all the 'in' joints in Madrid. 

Special appearances this week from the hosts: Emma Horner (Host) Rob (Horner's friend/host) Max (horner's friend/host) Hayley (Horner's friend/host) Beth (Horner's housmate)

Special appearances from the tourists: Oli Leech, Chopper, Allen, Gourlay, Crackers, Felton (Stag), Rusty, Benji, O Shea, Gabes, Josh Lee and Nick Farkas (Doctor and organiser of this trip).

 

 

THURSDAY

 

Summary of La Cocina de San Anton

Name: Ls Cocina de San Anton

Type:  Restaurant/Bar

Location: Calle Augusto Figueroa, 24, 28004 Madrid, Spain
Website: http://www.lacocinadesananton.com

Date Visited: 27/2/14

Price: Decent

Rating: 2.5/5

Review

 I arrived in Madrid and went to Emma's apartment where I dumped my stuff and declared my desperate need for some food as the Greggs Tuna Crunch baguette pre-flight had worn off.  We walked around a quirky little tapas market where I had to quickly explain that, although feeling cultural, I needed a good old fashioned sit down and a burger was almost certainly the food of choice.

  This restaurant was the floor above so we sat down and were joined by Madrid English residents Rob and Max.  The beers were flowing (tour and all that) and we gave our orders.  I went for the lamb burger of some kind so you can imagine my shock and alarm when no bun arrived.  I've moaned about buns having no consistency before but no bun at all....that's madness! Not to worry: 'Excuse senor, Bun?' I asked and 'Si' was the reply.  10 minutes (could of been 2) passed and a basket of stale bed arrived.  Alas, no bun for me this time.

That said the burger was exceptional and it was all very cheap, helped by Max taking advantage of his expenses through business.  That said I just couldn't get over the absentee roll so I can't give it a 3.

Do come here though.  Oh and one thing to note, I 'm not sure if its all of Spain or just Madrid but they absolutely love stale bread and refuse to have any dip, butter or anything.  It must be dry and difficult to eat.  Do not get it.



Summary of Areia

Name: Areia Colonial Chillout

Type: Bar

Location: Calle Hortaleza, 92, 28004 Madrid, Spain
Website: http://www.areiachillout.com/

Date Visited: 27/2/14

Price: Cheaper than England

Rating: 3/5

Review

 After the restaurant unfortunately, due to Max and Emma having work the next day, they had to depart.  I wasn't ready to sacrifice the night quite yet (11.30pm if you're asking) and luckily nor was Rob who I had met a few hours previous.  First things first, we were in the rumoured gay district so to avoid unfortunate misunderstanings which two guys sharing a drink may give, we exited out of the area.  Once out of the 'zone' we went to Areia.

  This bar is fairly cool and does double beefeater gin better than anyone else I know.  We had four gin and tonics and couple of jagers but still the girls weren't coming over to talk to us. Why?

 Lovely little bar this so if you want a chilled drink in Madrid I would recommend it as it had a 'cool man' vibe.  You know where I am coming from, bed in the corner sort of job.

Summary of Moby Dick Club

Name: Moby Dick Club

Type:  Nightclub

Location: 180-184 Earl’s Court Road, London, SW5 9QG
Website: http://www.mobydickclub.com/

Date Visited: 27/2/14

Price: Didn't pay...seemed cheap

Rating: 1.5/ 5

Review

  When Rob told me we were going to meet his Spanish rugby team mates and that we were going to a cool place, I was slightly concerned that this quiet meal was turning into a big one.  This increased when I was told the name of the club was the Moby Dick Club....I doubted it's Spanish authenticity.   On arrival we were greeted by 14 Spanish rugby players, relatively boozed and had a line of Jagers and beers ready for us to drink.

  I hastily, as per usual, did my shot and then took a swig of my beer with my right hand to disguise the taste.  Seconds later, I felt a hand on my right shoulder with a Spanish rugby guy wagging his finger from side to side.  'Senor' he said while pointing to my right hand. He then took me to the bar, ordered another beer and pointed to my left hand.  International drinking rules in play. Awesome.

  The Spanish rugby team where a good bunch and spoke good English so I had a good fun and was able to understand conversation.  Didn't stop me speak in broken English with a Spanish accent though.  Did that all week and have done so on my return which has been quite awkward.  Back to the club, unfortunately we were the only 15 people there as everyone (the girls in particular) left as we arrived.  Such a catch.  Rob and the Spanish rugby boys were good lads but wouldn't advise coming here unless you stumbled onto it or you are on a sports tour and want to get loose.

Me, Rob and the finger wagging Senor

FRIDAY

 

Summary of Cafee Eke

Name: Cafee Eke

Type:  Cafe

Location: Calle Cuchilleros, 3, 28005, Madrid, Spain
Website: http://www.cafeeke.com

Date Visited: 28/2/14

Price: Didn't have enough to comment

Rating: 1.5/5

Review

 

  I won't lie to you, I had a rather big hangover the next day when I woke up.  There was no time to dwell on this as I received a call from Oli Leech and Luke Chopper Harris....they had landed and were en route to Sol.  I set off to meet them and I was informed they were at a Belgian café just off Plaza Maya.  After trying 10 exits of Playa and walking around for half an hour I found them.

  Didn't know what to expect from a Belgian café in the centre of Madrid to be honest.  I didn't take any risks and only ordered two bottles of water.  The waiter took an age to bring them over and had a bit of attitude when I reminded him of my order.  That sounds like I was being a bit of an arsehole but he brought a tray out with everyone elses stuff so I was just double checking he hadn't forgotten mine.  In my defence I was parched.  Anywhere due to the water taking an age to arrive I can only give it 0.5.  Actually it gets 1.5 because the other boys were on good form and company is key.

Don't go here.



Summary of Zombie Bar

Name: Zombie Bar

Type: Bar/Restaurant

Location:  Calle Pez, 7  28004 Madrid
Website: http://zombiebar.es

Date Visited: 28/2/14

Price: Really good

Rating: 3.5/5

Review

Another authentic Spanish sounding bar.  This bar was on the same road as our apartment so we dumped our bags down and headed in.  The street is called Calle Pez and is basically London's equivalent to Shoreditch.  This bar was hella edgey with a giant Ronald Mcdonald head on the wall, the pints served in jam jars (take note Jam Tree) and the bills inside VHS cases.  This place offered free Wi Fi and the name of it was FREE GAY PORN.  No joke. Scene.

 We visited this place a lot over the week and was adopted as our local.  Try the Homer burger.  However, the waiters weren't particularly friendly at times and had little patience.  Luke's stray elbow knocking over the Waitress and smashing the tower of plates didn't help. 

They also moved us from table to table regularly to accomodate other customers and told us one evening that we had to be out by 9pm as 10 lads were not welcome.  Charming

That's cost you 4/5 but this is somewhere I strongly recommend especially for you East London folk out there.  Decent establishment.

Summary of Restaurante Alcaravea

Name: Restaurante Alcaravea

Type:  Restaurant

Location:
Website: 

Date Visited: 28/2/14

Price: Unreal

Rating: 4.25/ 5

Review

  Rob (Emma's Friend) had kindly hooked us up at this incredible restaurant which had opened only a few days prior.  The guy behind it all, who Rob teaches English to, has three other restuarants around Madrid adopting the same formula.  That formula works!  Rob, Oli, Chopper, Emma, Hayley and myself were sat in the middle of the restaurant with a nice long sociable table.  The food was perfecto mundo (Spanish reference for you) with my only concern being the plate it was served on.  When the knife scraped against the plate it reminded me of scraping a spade on pavement.  It gives me the shivers which was causing a scene so I had to change plates.

  The tapas they ordered included 'broken eggs' (ham egg and chips) which was a particular highlight along with the Ox.  Once food was finished it was time for a few goblets of Hendricks accompanied with a cucumber and when the bill arrived at around 35 Euros each we were delighted.  Oli by the end was slumped on the bar mumbling about the great cheese while Chopper was asking people to take a photo of him and Rob.  A bromance had formed and then we received a text...the remaing 10 lads had landed.  Oops only 9 as Rusty had missed his flight due to over celebrating his promotion.

The gang

Summary of The Passenger

Name: The Passenger

Type:  Bars

Location: Calle Pez, 16, 28004 Madrid, Spain
Website: http://www.parolio.com/portfolio/the-passenger/

Date Visited: 28/2/14

Price: So much cheaper than England

Rating: 3/5

Review

 

The final remaining lads (bar Rusty) had arrived.  12 (minus Rusty) lads from Newcastle Uni, Rob, Max, Emma and Hayley formed the formidable force.  We met at the bar, The Passenger, where everyone was on different levels of drunkness.  Emma, Hayley, Max and Rob (Madrid Locals) were holding it together, the newly arrived 10 lads were stone cold sober, Luke and I were well oiled and Oli was really struggling.

 

  This place is quite cool (which was to be expected with it being on Calle de Pez) and is very thin like all the places in Madrid.  Probably too thin for our group party.  Hendricks were back out again and Nick (the host) lost an unfortunate game of 5's meaning he had to 'see it off'.  No repeats of his neknominate (thank god) and it certainly added to the atmosphere of excitement and anticipation of what held next.

 

  The Passenger (the pub not Oli Leech who at this stage had become one due to his inebriety) they have flat screens are all along one wall showing surfers, from memory, which was a bit random but still very original.  If you are in a party of 8 or less I would say this place is awesome for a few drinks but anything more than that I think the place is too thin and you can't socialise/operate properly.



Summary of B12 Bar

Name: B12 - The Bar lab

Type: Nightclub/Bar

Location: Calle de Joaquín Costa, 27, 28002 Madrid, Spain
Website:  https://www.facebook.com/pages/B12-The-Bar-Lab/174147709327798?id=174147709327798&sk=info

Date Visited: 28/2/14

Price: For Madrid Pricey

Rating: Not valid for a rating

Review

 Cost me 10 Euros to get in.  I was in a group of 5, we did laps of the whole place searching every floor searching for the other 10.  Was eventually told everyone was next door so we left within 15 minutes.

Entry was costly and the venue seemed cool albeit brief.  All I can say is that the stamps they use to prove entry take a good 30 showers to get off.  Put's infernons branding system to shame.

Summary of Marvel Bar

Name: The Marvel Bar Genius

Type:  Bar

Location:
Website: 

Date Visited: 28/2/14

Price: Free entry....get in

Rating: 3.25/5

Review

  After the confusion of entering the wrong bar we were welcomed like long lost soldiers from the rest of the group.  Oli Leech had turned it around and was back in the game.  The drinks were very much flowing now and the group were dancing like madmen.  Emma's friend also called Emma (which caused some confusion) and her friends joined the ever-growing group.  This place was situated over two floors, played great music, had high ceilings and the wait at the bar was short.  Gourlay was throwing some serious shapes which was causing quite a stir.  Unfortunately the place shuts at two so when we were just getting out 'the game changer' dance moves, the lights came on. The time was 2am but the group wanted more.

  If you are coming to Madrid and you have a large group of people (predominantly males) I would say head over here to start things off as its free entry and the place is European cool, whatever that means.

The Organiser on the left and The Stag on the right

 

Summary of La Cocina

Name: La Cocina Rock Bar

Type:  Bar and Nightclub

Location: Av de Alberto Alcocer, 48, 28016 Madrid, Spain
Website:  www.lacocinarockbar.com

Date Visited: 28/2/14

Price: ???

Rating: 3

Review

 

  For the pedantic ones out there this should 'technically' be classed under Saturday because we entered this club at 3am. LADS LADS LADS.  Now this place is very interesting.  Everyone was fairly tanked up and bouncing from walls to walls but the party was still operating at 100% attendance rate (minus Rusty and Emma's friend Emma's friends....very confusing)

 

  I can hear the question on the tip of everyone's lips...where in Madrid can we listen to Old school Linkin Park and Limp Bizkit (the band not Felton the Stag).   Here is the answer! Ben, Chopper, Josh Lee, Joe, Freddie and Gabes were getting their serious mosh on.  Everyone was to be fair.   One Spaniard took offence to our dangerously good dance moves and threw a drink over Fred.  It was tense but no further action was taken by either party.

 

  It put a slight dampener (no pun intended) on our evening but overall it was a great place to go after a night out when you still want more.  Think the Swan in Stockwell but a lot better.  On entry you were meant to get a free shot but I was failed to be given one. Probably for the best but even with Rob asking for my dues in Spanish they still declined.  That's cost you 0.25 of a point and takes you to a solid 3. 



SATURDAY

Summary of Mercardo Food Market

Name: Mercardo

Type: Food Market

Location:  Plaza de San Miguel, s/n, 28005 Madrid, Spain
Website: 

Date Visited: 1/3/14

Price: Depends on the stall

Rating: 3.5/5

Review

 Hello culture and hello rusty!  Rusty had arrived after missing his original flight which cost him Friday's nights 'debauchery'.  We arose from our beds/mattresses and we headed off to the food market (posh one apparently) I believe on Ben's (the chef) recommendations.

  I'm not a big fan of overcrowding, unless at a gig of course, but it is to be expected at a market so I wasn't fussed.  There were stall's everywhere (sort of the idea) and they had a wide range of items (again the idea).  I enjoyed almost every item I tried and enjoyed my Sangria more (what back on it at Midday, stop it).  In all honesty this place is really cool and the food is pretty decent, in particularly the Parma ham baguette.

  TIP: How to do it wrong was shown by Chopper Harris who had a rice pudding cheese ball....COLD! Then it was some Spanish version of a pasty (empanadas) which was like most supermodels (Hot on the outside, cold on the inside....oooh he's got all the gags).  To top it off he played it safe with Ham and Cheese on some famously Spanish stale bread.  Again it was a poor shout.

So the lesson here is amigos choose wisely.  For the experience it is a must visit in Madrid.

Summary of La Perejila

Name: La Perejila

Type:  Tapas Restaurant

Location: Cava Baja, 25, 28005 Madrid
Website:  https://www.facebook.com/pages/La-Perejila/116839091715751

Date Visited: 1/3/14

Price: Extremely well priced again

Rating: 2/5

Review

After the food market we were all still hungry as the food market was a nibbles sort of thing.  Due to the majority of restaurants and bars being quite small we quickly realised that the group would have to split up into two.

  I was in the second half with Farkas (organiser) Crackers (the Pole), Chopper and Josh (all the stories) Lee.  This place is highly recommended on Google, not that we knew that at the time.  You wouldn't of known it by the way we were greeted on arrival.  Admittedly I was wearing a T-shirt and Gilet (no jumper) which may have given off a touristy vibe.  Didn't quite fit into what they were looking for as the whole restaurant was singing in Spanish.

  After a couple of grunts and points from the waitress we found ourselves sitting at a table directly next to the toilet, convenient I suppose.  We ordered 4 beers and were presented with four quarter beers each.  Chopper downed it, lad.  We decided to upgrade from midget beers to Grande beers and this time we got nearer to the pints we were after.  Chopper downed that again (in fact he downed all 5 beers he was given....good effort). 

  The tapas presented to us was really nice actually and filled us all up quite well with our hunger satisfied.  The reason for this negative review, apart from the midget beers, was the waitress... terrible attitude

   I, in my fantastic Spanish accent, asked for Allioli.  I repeated this word 4 times to which the waitress would reply 'what are you trying to say?' 
This exchange continued until the waitress said 'please?!?!, can I have some?!?! Manners!'. 
'Allioli Gracias senorita?' I responded. 
Hellmans mayonnaise with a clover of garlic arrived.

Company was good with some fantastic stories in particular from Josh Loose Lee and Farkas but due to attitude of the waitress and the seating position I would say do not go.  Toilet Tapas is not a must!

Summary of La Jauria

Name: La Jauria

Type:  Restaurant

Location: Calle Colón, 10, 28004 Madrid, Spain
Website: http://www.tripadvisor.co.uk/Restaurant_Review-g187514-d3419133-Reviews-La_Jauria-Madrid.html

Date Visited: 1/3/14

Price: Again very good

Rating: 3/5

Review

It was the final night but before we started to head out to the nightclub scene where the Madrid local women would surround us, we had to get some grub.  This was trickier than it sounded as no place could accommodate 14 guys at 9pm (primetime).  We decided to split groups, with January to June birthdays in one and the rest of the year in the other.  Perfect way to split and we were off.

  After a couple of further rejections we found ourselves in La Jauria.  Now this came with a caveat.  We would all have to sit on one side of a long rectangle table facing the wall.  Conversation was difficult and limited to those next to you.  Lucky we are all such bloody legends.  I can't tell you how odd it is with everyone sitting in a line facing the wall while eating your food.

 Rob joined us and took his seat gratefully along side us opposite the wall.  I'll tell you La Jauria have some very funky purple wallpaper.  Waitress arrived and took our orders of 7 lamb shanks.  Continental.

  The lamb shanks were quality but the portion size was very little.  I came to the conclusion that the Spanish just love to have about 9 courses so the British attitude of just one big main doesn't really work.  Anyway it did a job, paid the bill, cheap again and we were off to join our amigos to hit the town. 

SHOT SHOT SHOT SHOT SHOT SHOT SHOT SHOT SHOT SHOT SHOT SHOT SHOT SHOT SHOT SHOT

EVERYBODY!



Summary of Le Boutique

Name: Le Boutique Discoteca

Type: Nightclub

Location: Calle de Serrano, 45, 28001 Madrid, Spain
Website:  http://www.leboutique.es/

Date Visited: 1/3/14

Price: London(ish)

Rating: 3.25/5

Review

 
 Now before we came to this place I have to do a little shout out.  After we had all joined force as one group of 14 lads we then went to Emma's friend Max's apartment which was on the 24th floor with amazing views of Madrid.  Admittedly it took us an hour for us to get to the flat from his flat due to the lift getting stuck and Farkas' emergency Spanish letting us down.  Cracknell, Josh Lee and Joe O Shea kept their cool. But once we arrived at the flat it was worth it, the view was incredible so thanks Max, hats off.

  After we left Max's playboy flat it was time to hit the tiles..again.  Le Boutique was decided by Emma to be the most accommodating establishment to let a group of over 10 well oiled lads in.  On arrival it was decided that we should get a table by paying 30 euros each which would include entry.  Very London.

  Leech, Allen and Crackers were on the verge hysteria until they realised that it was not 50 euros.  We got in and this place is quite basic in its idea.  It is just a giant room with disco floors, dance-floors and bars dotted around for you to top yourself up. Perfect.

 To be fair we didn't spend to much more than the 30 euros each as it covered us for most of the night.  This place I have to say does a job.  It's not going to win you over with its décor but its got a good dance floor, good music policy and stays open until very late.  This is of course important on the final night.

Worth going to this place I would say. 

The lads

 

 Poem Advice

I can't do a poem this week
It will take me far too long
To do a poem half heartedly
To me it just seems wrong


Sorry that it was a very long write up and if you are still reading now I applaud you.

It will be back to normality next week with a normal sized read for you all as there will only be a few places.

Special thanks in particular goes to Emma Horner for hosting our touring party well.  The same goes to Max, Rob and Hayley.

The host

GO TO MADRID is my simple advice.

 

See you next week fans 

x

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